"Safer at Home" Wardrobe Style

Image by Amanda Vick

I thought I had done an amazing job of getting an early jump on my Spring wardrobe.

I had dry cleaned and boxed up most of my winter sweaters and heavier Items.

I had assessed and then reassigned things* I wore in the winter, that did not bring me joy.

*Especially my asymmetric black sweater with the batwing sleeves, out of a super heavy rayon jersey that never stayed off the shoulder like it was designed to do. Instead it waded up around my arms and shoulders making me look like a line-backer. It was too bulky to wear under any design of any shape of woman’s coat and needed a strapless bra..... in the winter!

I of course, started a decent size donate pile and a small repair pile.

I had done all of the appropriate work, as many a wardrobe consultant or decluttering expert will say is required.

I even ordered some fun things for spring: a cute pistachio strappy sandal with a 3” heel,

a printed wrap midi dress, and a new tank swim top, in case I got near the water when it hits 112 degrees. I took out last year’s “Welcome to Spring/Summer Items”. I freshly washed, hung and placed them lovingly in perfect order, in my closet, ready for action as soon as the weather broke 75.

BTW, we do this In SoCal by mid-March, when we get some peak day temperatures reminding us that the terror of the summer heat is coming. I know my pretties, other locations put this off until perhaps May, but we SoCal ladies must move fast. If we don’t assess and plan ahead, we will never get the wardrobe “Must Haves” we need. Competition is tough for style combined with value. Instantly your size of whatever you want is long gone. Your fav dress is now available only in acid hot mustard or extra large clown polka dot. You can find the perfect swim top, but no version of a flattering bottom. Good luck with that on any day!

Of course, what I do for myself, I will also do for my friends. I will Marie Kondo the heck out of my GF’s closets and whip them up a Spring capsule wardrobe, just for fun.

Image by Stefano Zocca

This year though…there is a big “Oops” going on. Some call it a global

re-correction or prophetic event.

Not me.

Some just call it a really bad new year and

I rescind my trial offer, so let’s please start over. For others, it is plain ole bad luck of the science kind.

We all know it as…. “that which shall not be named”.

Besides "that which shall not be named", there are the rippling effects created by such an event.

One of the effects, although slightly trivial, is what I am calling a wardrobe readjustment or malfunction, of the “safer at home” kind. Nothing at all like the kind of malfunctions you might see at Coachella, Burning Man, Mad Max’s Thunder Dome and LA Red Carpet events.

This is more of a, “never planned on this kind of a capsule wardrobe” malfunction.

Few of us have a wardrobe capsule for being marooned at home with your family for 45+ days. I may be casual, but this is a whole level down.

Come now ladies, you know what I mean.

You know you too are in the unprepared wardrobe category if:

• You are now wearing sweats and PJ’s as daywear and then nightwear and then daywear.

• You have traded out other shoes for flip flops, Converse, Tom’s, Adidas, Nikes or slippers, aka UGGs, as your go-to shoe.

• You have resorted to wearing leggings with a gigantic unisex tee or hoodie that could belong to your teen son, more than 2 days in a row.

Personally, with current events, I had to come to terms with what I thought my life was going to be this Spring and what it now is, as far as my wardrobe is concerned.

My honey may believe this is more comprehensive, but he is wrong.

• It is not, date night out. (Cute floral dress + a sexy heeled sandal)

• It is not a social event with friends. (Skinny jeans with a fun top + some bling earrings)

• It is not girl’s day, lunch, shopping, and party drinks. (Trendy hi-rise mom jeans + mules)

• It is not meandering around Marshall's looking for stuff I don’t actually need. (Whatever)

Not a Ferret but you get the idea!

Currently it is stay at home and keep staying at home, until the Governor says stop. Only head out to the grocery or gas station, if absolutely required.

My life now is casual, relaxed, comfy hold the couch down with my ass while I am binge eating popcorn like a ferret, style. Ok, I do some work-outs too, people.

As such, this is an actual lifestyle wardrobe adjustment, which requires a wardrobe revamp.

I figure that if I need this wardrobe revamp, I am not alone.

Give me an AMEN! Head nod, something.

So, I have done the work for us and put together a few simple guidelines that I think will help put the focus on our current lifestyle.

“Safer at Home” Wardrobe Guidelines

Remove and Store

Items that need dry-cleaning or tailoring

Especially if you procrastinated on the tailoring……Gail.

Stilettos, and any mid-high or super sexy stripper heels

No need to trip around your place as you move from one room to another in rapid

pacing motion while trying to get those heart healthy steps in. You might accidently

fall and twist your ankle and it’s very hard to get that kind of medical attention in

today's real.

Items that need ironing

No one wants to iron anyway, but definitely not now. As your brain begins to melt

and blur from long term seclusion, you have the unintentional potential to start

your residence on fire.

Items that you save for date night

Wearing these, even if fun, might scare the kids, causing additional irreparable

harm. They will hold it against you and haunt you in your senior years with

colorful and embellished memories.

Dresses

We mostly want crotch coverage when doing our new decontamination

cleaning procedures. Clorox Bleach does not do well on some body parts.

Delicate lace, silk, satin or crochet items

When cooking multiple meals and steaming your face, for your endlessly bored

and constantly hungry fam, you don’t want to shrink, stain or distress such

fine fabrics.

Purses, Backpacks, Totes: especially Chanel, LV or Prada bags

We need to travel light now. Just a credit/debit card and keys.

Maybe a disposable paper list, some surgical gloves and a mask. All our lovely

status and mock status girl toys need to be shelved. No one cares whose

designer purse you have except to alert them that you have more disposable

income than they do. Plus, we need to run fast and carefree to the sanitizer

stashed in our car after touching all the groceries. No one can do that with a purse

full of all kinds of crap, or important things, that you find essential.

Most Jewelry

Sure, keep your fav basics that don’t get stuck in your hair or attach to your clothing.

Never mind the trendy multiple layering necklaces and dangling baby-pulling earrings.

You can revisit those later.

Items to Keep In Your Closet

Wash & wear items that are dryer shrinking safe

My honey has already shrunk all mine, so I’m good.

Items that don’t stretch out and bag with multiple wears

Stay away from the linen tees. They grow three sizes by nightfall.

Bleach friendly Items

Obviously best for whites, but if you wanted to give a tie dye look to some old jeans,

it could work.

Jeans that allow multiple and I mean multiple, wears

I heard that freezing can sanitize your denim, but only if you have freezer space

not taken up by extra chicken. I hold off the wash until multiple wears to preserve

my favs and I’m lazy like that.

Full body coverage jumpsuits for grocery runs

Running or Athletic shoes of all kinds and colors

Excellent for running from zombies or other mindless travelers butting into

my personal space.

Flats

Lounge and Sweat Friendly Clothing

Non-embarrassing Gym Leggings

Nothing sheer. Do the bend over in front of the mirror check.

No camel toe ladies and no moose knuckles boys, please.

We are already stressed enough.

Hoodies and Sweat Shirts (not torn or distressed unless in a trendy way, maybe)

For holy heck ladies, not those that belong to your teen son or honey.

Camisoles and Tanks for Layering

Tees (also not torn or distressed, as above)

Except the expensive ones you paid too much for, that were designed like that.

Hair Scrunches, Scarves, Ties, Headbands

We need every possible way for us to keep our hair out of our faces.

You don’t want all your fried frayed ends tickling you when out and about.

You can sew your own masks to co-ordinate with your hair items if desired, Nick.

Umbrella

See prior post "Social Distancing ....Umbrella Style" for further info.

Baseball Caps

Large Big Eye Covering Sunglasses

May be worn in store while shopping for additional facial protection with your mask

or when pretending to be Anna Wintour.

Rain Coat

I hope this helps you, my fashion squad and inspires you to give your wardrobe a quick look over. With this simple one day review, you too can be proud of the ease of your “Safer at Home” Wardrobe.

You can look in your closet and chose your OOTD knowing you are comfortable and ready for any task while being confident and current event friendly.

And remember that once the kids are back in school, when ever that is, we can revisit our wardrobes and together we can decide how to rebuild and once again find that girly beauty that we may have temporarily left behind.

Until then, my pretties.